How to reduce the frequency of breastfeeding at night

Is the frequency of breastfeeds at night feeling unsustainable?

Firstly I want to reassure you that breastfeeding your Small at night (whatever the number!)  is never a bad habit or needs to reduce/stop unless you want them to. 

But if the number of feeds feel unsustainable it’s always ok to make some caring changes.  Being honest it can be hard work and it’s unlikely to be upset free. 

However you can still put boob boundaries in place in a respectful and responsive way. I’d never suggest leaving your Small to cry solo. And you don’t need to stop all night feeds either!  

3 tips to How to reduce the frequency of breastfeeding at night:

1. Practice putting some daytime boob boundaries in place (if they’re 16/18 months plus)

If they ask for the breast during the day practice comforting them in other ways before offering the breast. Doing this can help them to accept it easier at night  (note I said easier not easy) It also gives you an idea of how they will respond at night to making some changes.

2. Build up to the boob 

When they wake up at night gradually build up to the boob. What does this look like? 

• When they wake up pause and ask yourself what are they trying to communicate to you 

• If they’re not crying/upset give them the chance to put themselves back to sleep or ask for support. 

• If they ask for support it’s always ok to go to them straight away. Reassure them with a sleepy sentence and try to settle them back to sleep in their sleep space with a cuddle/hand on them. 

  If that doesn’t work pick them up and try to settle them. 

  If you’ve got to this stage and they’ve not settled offer them a feed. 

  Sometimes giving yourselves the time to briefly settle in another way can reduce the frequency of feeds.

3. Do the boobie buffer 

• If you build up to the boob and there’s no change you could try the boobie buffer. What does this look like?

• Once you’ve built up to the boob try and settle them for a  very short amount of time without the boob but put a limit on it. And if they’ve not settled after this short time offer them the breast.

• This gives you both a chance to settle without the breast but you know it won’t be forever which can feel totally unmanageable.

  I’m always honest that this is unlikely to be tear-free and only YOU know if it’s something you feel comfortable with. 

  Again this is no guarantee but it may help to reduce the frequency of feeds. I can’t stress enough that you need to feel comfortable doing this because whilst crying/upset in the arms/presence of a loving parent isn’t the same as crying solo/crying it out it’s not for everyone. And that’s ok